There are people worse off than you.....
Do you know how much I hate this statement……I know people mean well when they use it but it really just makes you feel worse…
Have you had times when you have been really down and you decide to share your problems with someone, and the response you get is “Well there are people worse off than you.” What do you say to that? I know it’s meant to show you that things are not as bad as they seem to you, but all it does is show you that, yes things are not as bad as they seem and now I feel like a failure because I’m depressed about such a small and trivial issue. It shows up my weaknesses and I how should be stronger etc..etc..
Now I am not for one minute suggesting you enable the persons depression by agreeing that yes it’s all bad and they should be upset and they should feel that the world owes them more than this….but the next time someone shares something like this with you all you need to do is listen, without judgement. This is especially important for Old Boys. It takes a lot for an Old Boy to open up about something that’s troubling them, for fear of being seen as weak or less than what a man should be, and unfortunately the statement “There are people worse off than you” is a judgement call and will only serve to have the person shut down.
Just listen to understand.
Don’t listen to respond.
Certainly don’t listen to judge.