The Myth of Control
Everywhere we turn we are told that our destiny is in our hands. We are told we can become what we want, and get what we desire, if we follow the simple rules of the Law of Attraction, or practice positive awareness, or visualize daily. But why do so many people try and fail. Like everything in life, there is no black and white, and there is some truth and some bullshit in every approach to life.
Thinking positively is an excellent approach but is not the be all and end all. Simply thinking “I am Happy….I am Happy” will not make you happy if you don’t change your underlying core beliefs.
The Law of Attraction says that what we focus on we will attract, but most people interpret this as sitting and thinking about money and thinking about desires and goals and somehow they will come true. The Law of Attraction actually means that what our core (and often subconscious) beliefs and values are, is what we will attract. You may focus on a figure of $10m constantly every day, but if you have a core fear of interacting with people….well you need to address the core fear in conjunction with the focus.
Visualization is the act of thinking and feeling our goals in the present. The key here is ‘feeling’ the goals. By actually feeling what it would be like to reach your goal starts to open up new doors. In the end it is not the tangibility of the goal that is important, it is the feelings we get from having or achieving that goal. This is what drives us.
One of the problems that most people fail to understand is the complexity of the world and our level of control over circumstances. We are constantly told our destiny is in our hands….that is not true, but neither is the fatalist approach that our destiny is already mapped out. What we have control over is how we think, how we react to circumstances, and what actions we take. We do not have control over what other people think, how they react, or what they do.
Ultimately what we have is influence over our circumstances. Keep trying and influencing, but also accept that circumstances beyond your control sometimes change the result, and when that happens, adapt, adjust, and keep influencing…….but whatever you do, don’t let the outcomes rule how you feel and act.
Accept what is and keep moving forward ……..